So is this what it feels like to own a used car?

Rosie, for me, is less than a week old, but she’s really almost three years old.

I collected her on Saturday, but on Sunday morning she wouldn’t start. I called the free Roadside Assistance people who said the battery was almost dead. OK, so twenty minutes later, the battery was recharged and Rosie and I went for a little blast, and all was well.

Well, almost.

Rosie’s boot was full of water. No, not the boot space, but the boot lid. The space where the light cluster lives. Not a good place for water.

I managed to drain it out, and called the dealer and said “Oi!” and Rosie is now going back in to have the seals checked and the battery looked at.

I don’t know, maybe I’m unlucky, but Herman was completely flawless for the almost two years we were together, and now I’m having my first issues.

On a positive note, any work done/parts supplied will be free, and if things do go really pear-shaped, I have a 30-day, no quibble replacement policy, but it’s still a bit disappointing.

I am happy, however, that the pre-sale checks yielded a slightly worn tyre, so Rosie was given four new boots. And a free service.

So things are maybe not so bad.

And like her siblings from last year, she puts a big smile on my face when I push the loud pedal

I went to the British Motor Show 2008 at ExCeL in London’s Docklands on Wednesday.

Was a fun day out. Saw lots of cars (funnily enough) and took lots of pictures.

I don’t think the show was particularly well represented by normal car makers – no VW, BMW, Audi, but what was there was nice, including the Nissan GT-R with its Nürburgring record on film and plenty of concept cars.

On top of that, I particularly enjoyed the Honda Dreamscape show: a historical walkthrough of Hondas old and new, some fancy driving and a visit from Asimo the robot.

We also got so see some power boat racing demonstrations down on the waterfront.

And drank quite a bit of cider.

Certainly a nice way to punctuate the working week.

I bought a TomTom (other satellite navigation products are available) this week, and today was my first go with it.

I got up early, and armed with RDS adaptor, power cable, the device itself and a few other things, I set of downstairs to the garage. Bugger, forgot the windscreen holder doodah. Oh well, I need to go out and get fuel, so I’ll fit it later.

My nearest petrol station is the ASDA Isle of Dogs, but I got lost on the way! Typical. It’s only about 2 miles, and I get lost. And I have a TomTom, but not fitted. This just proves I need it.

In my defence, the road I needed to take to get to ASDA (Marsh Wall) was closed, so I had to figure out all the diversions myself, but still, I thought it somewhat ironic

Anyways, I refuelled, went back home, fitted TomTom, collected wife, and headed out east toward Southend-on-Sea.

TomTom is great. “Turn left,” she’d say and I’d carry on. Without skipping a beat, she’d work out a new plan “Take third exit at roundabout,” and I’d ignore that too. Eventually, she’d just say “turn around,” and the map would have a big green arrow pointing in the direction I’ve come from. I was half expecting her to “tut tut” or sulk or something, but no

Actually, she (and I’ve decided she is a she) did eventually give me the silent treatment in Southend, when she ran out of battery. Clearly the included power cable is not there for decoration.

Sometimes, I found her instructions to be at odds with reality, and her being a woman, and me being a bloke, I tend to just do as I’m told. For example, this caused me to visit the cinema by West India Quay, even though I knew perfectly well that it wasn’t the correct way home.

So a fun day. We went (Southend is a shit hole, by the way), got lost, went to places we didn’t intend to go, but got back home in one piece, and Herman, content to stretch his legs a bit, is safely tucked up in the garage again, ready for a new day of automotive joy tomorrow…

Oh wait, it’s the sodding marathon tomorrow. Grrr.

This Sunday, you are organising the London Marathon, a fine tradition and much loved by all.

However, on Sunday, the side road leading to my home is going to be closed. For most of the day.

How do I know this? It’s not because you put up signs, or perhaps posted a noticed through my letterbox, say, two weeks in advance*. No, it’s because it happens every year, so I’m getting used to it.

This year, however, I have a car, and actually might want to go somewhere (and come back) on Sunday. But I can’t unless I leave early, come back late, or find somewhere else to park my car.

If I choose the latter, will you, as the cause of the road closure, compensate me for my parking fees?

I suspect I’ll choose the former, a kind of reverse house arrest.

So thank you for this.

Sincerely,

soapyfrog

* yes, there is this but I had to google for it

As demanded by Richy:

Updated: replaced pic after loss of blog in May

So, my new car finally arrived yesterday at about 5.30pm, only one day, five hours late.

It’s very shiny and lovely and I shall call it Herman (the German).

I had hoped it would have been delivered much earlier in the day, giving me plenty of time to menace the roads without all the rush hour traffic getting in the way, but sadly it was not to be, so it just got parked. I’m pleased to say I did not crash on the short journey to my parking spot.

Later, reading the operating manual whilst drinking a beer, I learned something that the dealer didn’t tell me. A feature that I hadn’t discovered previously by searching the interweb:

Launch Control.

Mwah ha haha ha.

Hopefully my next post on the subject won’t be from a hospital bed

Today, I was supposed to take delivery of my first car and was quite excited.

Yesterday afternoon, however, the dealer called me up with bad news. It arrived on the ferry from Germany into Kent somewhere, then got loaded onto a transporter and taken up to Grimsby. Grimsby! I live in London so this is not the right thing for it to do. I am concerned for its safety. Not even I would want to go to Grimsby.

Anways, this means that instead of it being checked and cleaned and delivered to me this morning (and I’ve fully paid for it by this point), I have to wait until tomorrow.

I suppose I should be thankful it hasn’t been shipped by Apple, otherwise it’ll be visiting Eindhoven, Cork and Portsmouth before arriving.

So a little while ago, a decided it was about time I got a car, terrorised the roads and pollute the planet.

I spent a little time choosing, ruling out, dithering, test driving, justifying and eventually just wanting a particular one, and I have now ordered it.

I won’t say what (don’t want to jinx anything), but suffice it to say, it’s German and shiny and it should be delivered in “eight to twelve weeks.”

Despite my earlier thoughts on iPod/iPhone preparation, I have actually not bothered. Apparently iPod integration solutions are usually rubbish (e.g. limit of 99 controllable songs in a play list) so I’ve opted for one with an audio line in. As for the phone bit, I don’t think I really want the car to be a giant bluetooth handsfree kit, and using a phone in any way in a car is not really cricket these days.

Now, what do people usually do when they’ve got three months to wait for a new toy to arrive?

Today, I was planning to visit my older brother. He lives in a smallish town in London’s south-west suburbia. My other brother, who lives on the south coast, would also be there, so it would be a good opportunity to catch up with siblings, deliver Christmas presents, and generally be merry.

However, my plans are thwarted because apparently, on Boxing Day, there are no trains, and I have no car.

Yet.

This is ironic because in the 23 years that I haven’t had a car, I’ve never felt particularly immobile; there was always a reasonable alternative to the private car. Now I’ve decided to buy one, I found myself stuck.

It’s also strange that in 23 years, I never realised that you can’t get a train on Boxing Day. I suppose subconsciously I always knew this, and travelled at other times around the Christmas period.

So why do we not have a train service on one of the few days of the year when people have the time to go and visit people? Seems odd to me. Perhaps all the train crews are busy shopping in the post-Christmas sales.

I’ve decided to buy a car.

I’m 40, and never had one before, so that’ll be 23 years of saving the planet, way before it became trendy to do so.

As a result, I’ll probably get something really bad for the environment, but I’ll still have a lower life-time carbon footprint than all the Prius-driving, tree-hugging hippies out there.

Now the tricky part is finding a car that has both an iPod interface for music and an iPhone-compatible phone preparation.

This may prove to be tricky. Maybe I’ll just go for the former (and use my old Nano) and get the bluetooth handsfree for iPhone.

Or maybe I’ll just not use the phone at all. Apparently it’s a Bad Thing™.